I’m not a grown up yet 21/01/15 - A-Level Trauma

Wow, I hadn't written here in a long time. So what had been happening? It had seemed like a little, but also a lot. I guess I was the queen of juxtapositions.
Well I had been very stressed, whether it be homework, coursework, dance, drama; there was too much to write. But the main culperate of my stress: A Levels. {insert gasps}.Sixth Form evening had come way too quickly, and once the dreaded day had arrived I wasn’t prepared. Everyone else seemed to have a clear path expertly dug out for them, smooth taremac to ride upon, but me? Pot-holes galore, every turn a bump to startle me. The thought made shiver. What did I want to do with my life? I guess the idea that one day I would have to grow up never dawned on me. I thought I would be a child forever, but with my 16^th year on this world looming, I had to face the fact of life. I had to get a life.Forgetting the importance of GCSEs, opening a booklet about requirements for A-levels left me feeling numb. I mean, it’s not like I had been slacking, my grades were important to me, especially coming from such a competitively academic friendship group, but I hadn’t realised they weren’t just ‘grades’ anymore. They were the keys to unlock A-levels. Wrong key meant no A-level. A locked door. I had to get Bs and above. There was no other option. My future depended on the work of 15 year old, immature, Katy, who had a lot to learn. Why others weren’t freaking out like me left me feeling puzzled. Were they not scared? Or were they just good at hiding it?Either way, after many speeches, presentations, and so on so forth, I had made my decisions.Art, Creative Writing, History, Sociology.These decisions would affect everything. University, career, pay, happiness. Everything. But I had to trust myself and my decisions. Despite being 15 year old, immature, Katy, who had a lot to learn, I had learnt enough to get me this far, a good student with good friends. I just had to take a jump of faith, that is, a well thought out, considered jump, in which I had tried to look at where I would fall – or hopefully gracefully land. Okay maybe not gracefully but still.My New Years Resolution? I had to find out more about my future. Research careers and their requirements, and ensure I met them.

- AllThingsKaty

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